Bullying is something that needs to be deal with on a national level.
Statistics are everywhere yet people who are bullied are taking their lives, loosing confidence and missing out on life because other people have decided that they are going to use them to deal with their own sad, miserable and unhappy lives. Happy people do NOT bully. Happy people do NOT hurt other people on purpose. Indeed help is needed for both parties. But the priority of HELP must be for those looking for it.
Bullying is such a hot topic at the minute, but it is also a hot potato as nobody wants the buck to stop with them. But no matter how you try to explain or dismiss bullying someone somewhere is not happy. I would suggest many people are unhappy, but the most important person is the person who is experiencing the bullying. Unfortunately this generally turns out to be a young person who has tried to deal with the situation by themselves but has been unsuccessful and has shouldered the burden to the point that their mental health has began to suffer.
Unacceptable as this is, the reality remains, people are bullied DAILY. People, young and old are feeling lonely, scared, isolated and desperate due to the actions and words of others. The usual suggestion is ‘ignore it’. But how do you ignore someone? Well intentioned as it may be the mere suggestion suggests that the listener has not listened. Result ‘No point in talking to you again’!
At Jepeca we see many referrals where individuals refuse to come to school, are self harming, withdrawn or have suicidal thoughts. Our techniques help alleviate these feelings and put them back in control. The following is a good starting place and provides support where and when needed… LIFE helps provide a process that allows the individual to feel heard.
1. Listen – Everyone wants to be listened to. Not just nodding head listening but actual recall of what was said listening. Make sure you get it!
2. Inspire – Your body language and words will determine what will happen next. Use this time wisely. The window of opportunity is tiny but the ability to make a difference is HUGE. Be present, it makes a difference.
2. Finally – This is where the listening pays off and the individual feels listened to. Suggest keeping a log of events. When did it happen? Who was involved? Where it happened? What happened? How did you feel? What did you do afterwards? Meet weekly to discuss contents. Update with what YOU have done e.g. keeping an eye on the situation, talking with those that are involved etc.
3. Evaluate – Is it working? What else may work? What, if anything has improved? Do you feel better?
Bullying is very serious with the affects and effects touching many lives. Open, honest discussion with clear guidelines and policies, available to staff and parents help to create an environment where students can thrive and grow in the knowledge that they ‘DO MATTER’, they ‘ARE HEARD’ and ‘BULLYING WILL NOT BE TOLERATED’.
Contact Jepeca to see how we can help your child, or your environment better deal with bullying.
Be happy 🙂